Tactical errors in advertising
Submitted by petermorwood on December 17, 2007 - 16:22.
Advertising vocabularies differ depending on what's being sold. A sports car doesn't get the same write-up as a family saloon, and a laptop computer isn't described in the same high-tech language as an iPod. But there are some words which have crossed genres, and now seem to be applied with blind enthusiasm in the most unlikely places.
My current favourite is tactical.
You'll find it defined on Answers.com in various ways, but they quote the current U.S. Military Dictionary, which for this LJ entry seems more appropriate than most.
tactical, adj.Designed or implemented so as to gain a temporary limited advantage: short-range.
1. of, relating to, or constituting actions carefully planned to gain a specific military end.
2. (of bombing or weapons) done or for use in immediate support of military or naval operations. Often contrasted with strategic.
This once-military-only term has since moved, via business, into more-or-less everyday use, but it's slipped its leash and like an unruly dog, is leaving traces of its passage in places where it shouldn't be allowed to go. (Mind your feet.)
There are a lot of websites which sell military, paramilitary and pseudomilitary paraphernalia. A lot of it is solidly practical: no matter how my-country-right-or-wrong patriotic they might be, everyone in the armed services is aware, sometimes uncomfortably so (such as when, just after takeoff, only 300 feet up and thus too low to bale out of a non-ejector-seat aircraft, the engine makes a small apologetic noise you've never heard before and don't want to hear again any time soon) that their ship, tank, plane, uniform, boots and weapon have all been build down to a budget by the lowest bidder. Small wonder they like to augment at least their personal equipment with something apparently better than issue kit.
Some of those non-issue items are described on websites that are both serious and sensible; others seem to be little more than a stage for testosterone-fuelled macho posturing. The level of aggression in the way items are described is a fair way to judge, though sometimes even the sensible sites get so over-excited they need a cold shower and a lie-down.
One word both sorts of site fling around with wild abandon is tactical, and even those who are a lot closer to "tactical reality" have noticed how silly things are getting. Tactical knives, tactical torches (flashlights), tactical pens (yes, really) tactical equipment webbing, tactical vests (multi-pocket military rather than Monty Python string). All very well, I suppose - but when you find the word being applied to the other sort of vest, as well as socks and underpants (Google for "tactical underwear" - you will find it) you do start to wonder whether the copy-writers need to be beaten around the head with a good military dictionary. The trouble with buzzwords is that they eventually become as annoying as any other buzz, be it feedback, mosquito or mechanical flaw, and are either ignored, swatted or fixed so that it can't be heard.
Of course, there are always those boxer-shorts with a little pocket for condoms, but though wearing such undies might provide "a temporary limited advantage at short range", I don't think tactical is quite the word for any subsequent encounter. And if it is, I don't want to know the details, thank you very much. "Fix bayonets..." "Present arms..." Oh dear oh dear.
The real problem with "tactical garments" isn't that the word (military in origin, remember) is misplaced when all this kit is worn by civilian wannabes. It's that with obesity being the problem it is, the civilians are frequently sometimes more, let's say circumferentially enhanced, than would be tolerated in the services. That's why I think military-style clothing made available to the civilian market shouldn't be listed as "tactical" after about size XL.
We're looking at the bigger picture here, so let's call them strategic - and in cases where "waistline" is more like "equator" we could even go as far as global.
Truth in advertising? I wait with bated breath.
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Just say Hallo
Hi Peter,
I just want to say hallo from the old cuckoo-clock-country. We've lost contact, perhaps because of the changing of the mailaddresses. So I Have to try it this way. (My new one is now in your system).
So how are you and Diane? Hopefully fine
It would be nice to hear something from you...
Greetings
Hanno
Ximoc
Peter,
Are you, by chance, the same Peter Morwood that had work published in the comic book Ximoc? If so, I was wondering if you might have any spare copies laying around that you would be willing to sell.
I'm working on a reference guide for alternative Irish comics and Ximoc (as well as other titles published in and around Belfast) is very important to my research. Please, let me know.
Best wishes,
Victor
Re:
Manga artist Ryusuke Hamamoto is working on an Alan Moore fan book. ... The Opposite of Comix is Ximoc. Nov. 14th, 2009 at 9:20 PM. Pochiyama! discount auto parts ... a number of independant creators have banded together to create Indy Comic Book Week an event that will attempt ..... but that's already been published in GN form anyway! .
Ximoc
Hi Victor -
Sorry about the ridiculous delay in replying (just over a year, for Heaven's sake!); having a website is one thing (Diane set it up for me: "You WILL have a website...") but adding material and keeping an eye on what goes on there is evidently something else entirely...
Yes, the contributor to Ximoc was me; unfortunately I don't have any spare copies. I wish I did, and I'd love to know what happened to the few I did have; my late Mum was very good about not chucking my stuff out even long after I'd left home (it all migrated to the attic, which became a somewhat dusty time capsule) but the Ximocs vanished long before then. I have a sneaky feeling, based on not having as many copies of my own novels in the house as I'd like, that I gave my Ximoc freebies away without making sure there was at least one of each left for me...
My contribution was: a comic strip written (and drawn!) by me, based on my character Aldric from the "Horse Lord" books; a short story (again, with a couple of illustrations by me) which was a reworked extract from what later became "The Demon Lord"; a science-fiction story (with one illustration) and a script for one of Will Simpson's "Cuchullain" stories.
I hope this is of some use...
Irish comics
Hi Peter. I found these comments while browsing. As a historian of Irish comics myself, I wonder would it be possible to put me in touch with Victor? I'm the main editor of the Irish Comics Wiki, attempting to gather everything there is to know about comics and comics creators from Ireland in one place, and I've heard of Ximoc but I don't know much about it and I've never seen a copy. It'd be nice if Victor and I could pool our knowledge.
Thanks.